While getting down and dirty in bed, if you like some naughty talk, there’s no harm, if your partner doesn’t think you’re a pervert. Choose your words with care, or just enjoy the ultimate pleasure of silent lovemaking. Sex and words are an explosive combo. Words are powerful—whether in the boardroom or in the bedroom. Sex is greatly influenced by the ability to communicate and crucial to a healthy relationship. It’s important to know how to successfully integrate sex talk into your sex play.
What you should say
The first is the content, which makes or breaks any sex talk session. What you say is supposed to turn your partner on and not make her/him cringe or burst out laughing. The second aspect is the delivery: Your tone, volume, facial expressions and body language convey everything.
How to say it all
To introduce something new into lovemaking, such as talking sexy/dirty, test the waters in casual conversations. Your partner may flatly refuse to entertain the idea, in which case, dump it, as any further attempts may be a turn-off.
What you shouldn’t say
Don’t talk about other women: Talk about other women and your girl will feel mighty insecure. Any insecurity during lovemaking is a big turn-off. Rarely, it may turn a woman on to know that other women want you. To be safe, steer clear of the topic unless she wants you to broach it.
- Don’t mention family
References to his family or yours are strictly out of bounds. Discussions about in-laws while you make love will have the partner jump out of bed or start a fight. Women don’t like the mention of their super-sexy younger or elder sister; that will make them pull the plug on the lovemaking shebang.
- Don’t give a running commentary
Though simply relaying what you are doing at the time and how good it feels is a great start, don’t go on and on about it. It can be a huge dampener. Just say: “This drives me crazy” “Your xxxx feels so good” or “I love how my xxxx feels when you do that.” Such love talk helps couples learn what gives them a high.
- Don’t laugh at the wrong things
Talking dirty can often be hilarious and laughing can be unintentional and involuntary. This may hurt your partner. Tell your partner that you are afraid that she/he will laugh at you. This leads to greater understanding and the couple can tell each other what they like and what they don’t.
- Don’t be in a hurry to give or get feedback
It can be tough to discuss how well you are doing while in the act. So, save the analysis for later. If your partner does not like something and you clearly do, she/he won’t want to embarrass you. Discuss sex when you are more relaxed during non-sexual moments of togetherness. Talk about the parts/actions you both liked, or if either of you has stopped liking them at some point. Keep the discussion lighthearted and fun.
Also Read: Here’s How To Master Casual Dating